Strategies for handling Difficult People

Strategies for handling Difficult People

Tips & Prayer

This page is for people who want to

learn better ways of handling difficult people.

This page talks about how to deal with them

( practical, unique strategies )

and

how to avoid them.

First -

How to avoid difficult people.

Too often people bring someone into their life

without seeing the warning signs

that expose difficult people.

Do not create

a close relationship with someone - too quickly.

Next -

How to deal with a Problem Person

The following video

is an introduction to our topic.

All types of people

can learn new skills on this page.

I can almost guarantee that you will learn insights on this page.

This page is for you

no matter

what your natural response to difficult people has been

in the past....

Silence, anger, sarcasm, retaliation, passive/aggressive, etc.

Learn

how to

monitor yourself and your responses - 

and seek God on how to react. 

Often saying nothing and ignoring the person's

"uncalled for words" is the best option.

When

it  is

appropriate to "say" something, 

this page will give you ideas about what to say

and what to do.

-

Be VERY careful

about what you choose to do concerning your boss.

For most of this page

we have videos

on

how to

actively say or do

things

to either reduce conflict

or

reduce you getting continually stepped on. 

It is always right to choose

to be godly and calm.

The less you stir up your emotions - the better.

You are a

Representative for Jesus Christ.

And whatever you do or say,

do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus

Colossians 3:17 NLT

Sometimes what we should do

and what we want to do

fight each other.

Let's make sure "right" wins.

You may greatly desire to 

powerfully

straighten out the other person

but

it is important to remember

that you are

An ambassador for God.

2 Corinthians 5:20

Ephesians 6:20

Let's begin by reminding ourselves of what God tells us.

The Bible says,

1 Corinthians 6:19 NLT

"Don’t you realize

that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit,

who lives in you and was given to you by God?

You do not belong to yourself. "

Galatians 2:20 NLT

" My old self has been crucified with Christ.

It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. "

Matthew 20:28 TLB

 " Your attitude must be like my own,

for I, the Messiah,

did not come to be served,

but to serve,

and

to give my life as a ransom for many. "

God wants us to lay our life down

daily

to give glory to God.

This next video

is for those of you

who have a hard time being silent. 

This video will help you

choose silence when silence is needed.

Nevertheless, all people may gain insights.

The video also shows

tips on HOW to be silent.

Disclaimer: Please see our Yoga page.

The video also shows

tips on

HOW to Speak - up

wisely 

Under the video,

a person wrote this in the comments:

You have no idea how your videos have helped me.

We just celebrated 33 yrs married & neither of us fought fairly.

You've taught me

how to approach arguing better & we haven't had a blow-up

in months.

Thank you!

It is always

the right thing to do

to pray

about your difficult situations

and to

pray in a biblical way

for your "enemies" and those

who are not acting Christ - like to you.

I will include

that type of prayer on this page. 

This is not a page of

being aggressive, angry, and controlling.

It is about

finding the godly path through difficult situations.

NOW -

Let's Learn

what to say

to stop as much abuse or irritation

as we can. 

Let's Get Insights

Most

of these videos

are from

Jefferson Fisher.

He does not present himself as a Christian.

I generally agree with his advice.

Yet,

always listen and filter information

through biblical principles.

Stirring anger in yourself is not helpful.

One of the ways

to conquer anger

is to give

appropriate responses coupled with

a tone and manner that is godly.

Gaining stature

 - as the leader of the conversation - 

helps tone down

difficult people.

Here are some words to use that create leadership.

Some difficult people

have a habit of doing a  

One - up 

in a conversation.

For example,

You share good news them with, and they "One-Up" you.

I encourage you to listen to

lots of these videos

to learn more about yourself and others

so you can have better conversations.

One way to

calm things down

~ ~ ~

Boundaries Section

The next 5 videos are about Boundaries -

some are less than a minute

~ ~ ~

What if people

hate my boundary?

If

it is not a strong "No"

then

Notes from Beth

People often ask why you are saying "No."

Note that many people want to find out why you said "No" so they can pick apart your excuse.

For example

If you say, "No," to an invitation, a person will often ask, "Why not."

Then if you say, "I can't go because I do not have a babysitter."

Then the person will say, "I know someone who can take care of your children."

Soooooo - if you do not want people to pick apart your reason and take it upon themselves to fix your reason - then just say, "I don't want to give my reasons right now." 

For rude or difficult people,  you may have to firmly say, "I do not want to explain myself."  Or "I do not need to explain myself." 

Take note: It is your right to say no to an invitation. You do not have to feel like a mean person if you do not give a "good" excuse. And please remember, giving extra words after "No" is only going to entice most people to keep trying to get you to say, "Yes." 

More inspiration 

about

Turning down an invitation

Saying "Yes"

too often

keeps you so busy

that you do not have time for the important things 

Our 5 th video on Boundaries

Key information

for

making

boundaries

for

difficult people

who use your words

to hurt you.

Toxic people

do not want to understand you.

They are looking for a

reaction.

They enjoy prolonging conversations that frustrate you.

As a Christian,

any comment you decide to say, should be said

in a godly way.

More Strategies for handling difficult people

Dealing with

RUDE

comments

Dealing with a

high - conflict

person

Dealing with

Dismissive Comments

such as...

Don't be so sensitive; I was just joking.

A video for

dealing with people who continually use

dismissive comments

Comments below the video

Someone I barely knew recently used the "I was just joking" on me in a group setting. Having seen this video, your line: "Then be funny" popped into my head. I said it with zero aggression, a half-smile and infinite calm. His mouth dropped open, the table went quiet and all eyes turned on him. After a pause, the conversation resumed, and later he actually tried to be agreeable. On my way home my heart was singing. That single line gave me confidence and bolstered my self-respect. I still get a giggle when I think about it.
Thank you so much.

"If that really was a joke, we'd both be laughing, right?"

One time, my older narcissistic sister said something hateful to me again, and I expressed that it hurt my feelings in some way. And she said the ole’ “stop wearing your heart on your sleeves”, comment, and I finally got the courage to say, “that is something mean people say so they can get away with continuing to be mean!” My mom and both my sisters couldn’t believe that came out of my mouth because I think they didn’t think I was that smart and I had been thinking things like this for years, but just never had the courage to get them out! It didn’t really change their ways, but it gave me a little bit more self power than I had before.

"I was just joking." "Sorry, could you explain the funny part?"

I respond with "don't be so in-sensitive." If they continue, I say, "Wow, you are completely oblivious." and walk away. No use wasting time or energy on them.

“I’m not laughing. Don’t quit your day job.”

I always tell my kids if only one is laughing its not a joke its bullying. Full stop.

Words like stones, they bruise and sting,
"Just a joke," the dismissive ring.
But I decide what hurts, what's true,
My feelings mine, not up to you.
"Don't be sensitive," they say with a sneer,
But I sense your intent, crystal clear.
I'll speak my truth, calm and strong,
Turning your words where they belong.

Handling negativity

Get them to

re-package their comment

Prayer Break 

This is a Prayer Break

to help us

keep our focus on God and on following him closely.

Our first prayer is from 

Dr. Robert Singleton

This website page

addresses emotional topics.

The purpose of this page

is to help people

to come to a place of

greater peace and calmness and godliness.

Yet,

thinking about wounds - and unkind people - can stir us up.

I invite you to join me in prayer...

Dear Heavenly Father,

I need help with difficult people.

I find myself
getting upset and even angry
when
I am with certain people.

I want to become more like my Lord  - Jesus Christ.

Father,

As I read this page and think about its advice,

help me to keep

bringing my thinking back

to a place of teachableness and godliness.

People who hurt me

usually hurt me

because

they do not know you well enough.

I pray for those who come to mind as I watch these videos.

As a Christian,

a part of me wants to love them

like Jesus loves them.

Yet, there is a part of me that

can get stirred up in un-godliness.

I want to always resist that.

I will follow Jesus and 

I will love others and learn to love them even deeper.

Father, I was not created to be

a resource for people to manipulate, abuse

or just continually

hurt me.

I am reminded that

my painful experiences have made you sad.

Help me

to not confuse

forgiving others

with thinking that I am not worthy of being treated right.

Also,

I ask you to remind me often

that as an ambassador for Christ,

I am a bridge to Jesus

through my words and actions.

That means

sometimes people will walk on me

by treating me badly and hurting me.

I want to forgive as Jeus taught me.

On the cross, Jesus said,

"Father forgive them for they know not what they do."

Father, if these people who have hurt me, knew you better,

they would be

better

people.

I pray for those who have hurt me.

I pray that their eyes  and ears will be opened to truth.

I pray that they will learn to love you in a deep way.

I pray that their attitudes and actions will one day

become

transformed by the power of Jesus Christ. 

Until that happens,

help me to protect myself

in godly ways

while

refusing

to allow unforgiveness, anger, and offense

to come and dwell in my heart. 

Help me to know when to be silent and when to say something.

And most of all, help me to show forth calmness and godliness. 

Remind me that I am YOUR ambassador to the world.

I want to do a good job of representing you.

I pray in love and devotion

and

in Jesus' name,

Amen

Copyright © 2026 Beth McLendon of Inspirational-Prayers.com

Belittling Comments

We all are sometimes confronted 

with 

Belittling Comments

-

Below is a short video 

taken from the longer video posted after it.

Handling

Belittling Comments

Concerning the video above -

Beth's Comments

When someone answers,

"Yes, I meant to embarrass you"

what do you do?

As Jefferson said,

silence in this situation is a good idea.

A second idea to consider

is answering,

"Interesting"

and then silence -

or

"good to know"

and then silence.

Using too many words

The attention span

of most people

is very short

Be a well

instead of a waterfall

Saying

too much

makes you look like you are not truthful

Talking too much

can occur because

you are having trouble finding the right words

Tips for

when you need to be direct

Tips for

avoiding

a person's triggers

More Tips for

avoiding

a person's triggers

I like his suggestion of " it's a me thing. "

The other suggestions

really need to be said with a lot of humility

or

the person probably will not receive it well.

For marriage - I have successfully said, "When I hear you say that, the enemy whispers that you do not care."  Note - There must be genle humility.

If you have

a hard time saying nothing

when getting gaslighted,

try this phrase;

then move on away from the conversation.

There are many

reasons

why a person is not ready

to handle a discussion on conflict.

Jerks for Jesus

We all deal with these people. 

Sometimes we also need to work on applying verses.

A gentle answer turns away wrath,

But harsh words stir up anger.

Proverbs 15:1

See our pages - Resisting Anger  and Resisting Offense

Tips  for  Difficult  Family  Members

Tones, Moods, and Negative Comments

that disturb us

She does give some ideas later in the video.

At 6 minutes 10 seconds, she gives us scenarios.

Beth says -

Fix what you can fix - If you can talk to the person who is misunderstanding you and get to a better place - do it.

If you can't fix the issue, then learn to pray about the issue.

Ask the Lord for ideas on how to let other people's moods and attitudes and words - roll off you like water off an umbrella. ( You are under God's umbrella. See yourself as safe and secure and contented under God's umbrella.)

One minute tip

on

calmness

Reviewing the topic
of
Handling Toxic People

Remind Yourself of these helpful Tips

The following outline

is mostly from the video that follows.

Things to do.

1. Stop reacting to everything they say.

Solution -  Do nothing. No emotion.

2. Stop explaining yourself to everyone. You are not being helpful to toxic people by explaining.

Solution - Say:  "This is what I choose to do," or "This is what I chose to do."

Beth adds -

If you are in an close relationship with a kind person,

then

explaining creates more intimacy.

They appreciate you and you two draw closer.

With -

Toxic people 

Do Not explain yourself.

* Of course a toxic boss is an exception.

3. Create consequences for bad behavior. Not yelling or fighting.

Solution - Pull back. Delay. Bad treatment means they lose access to you.

4. Become comfortable being disliked. Accept it.

Solution - Say, "I will accept this. I can be contented and at peace as I accept this more and more."

Dear God,

Help me to accept this.

You are able to help me do impossible things. 

I will praise you.

Amen

5. Show toxic people that you are fine without them.

.

What makes

toxic people stop targeting you?

Comments under the video

First comment:

I handle mean people by saying nothing, I look at them, and I raise one eyebrow. It usually ends with them trying to take back or modify what they've just said.

Second comment:

It’s crazy how peace becomes your filter. The moment you choose calm over confrontation, the wrong people just fade on their own.

Third comment:                    Note: 

If only it were that simple.
Standing your ground enrages people like narcissists. Particularly if they're your boss.
They demand submission and instant compliance, and when they don't get these,
they not only ensure you lose your job,
they go out of their way
to destroy your career
so that you never get another job in your chosen industry

Our

last video

review

before ending with a 

Prayer Break

See our How to Forgive links   and

pages -  Resisting Anger  and Resisting Offense

For all our articles see - Here

Prayer Break

It is always a good time to

Pray