Prayers for Grieving Spouses are given
a Glimpse into one Widow's pain.
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We can become lost in a sea of grief.
We can feel like we are alone in a tiny boat
surrounded by empty waters.
We want to thank an anonymous friend of
the Inspirational-Prayers team for sharing with us this page written
for those who have lost a spouse.
The words on this page are from her own grieving widow's heart.
Many widows are able to move somewhat quickly through
the worst part of grieving.
I was not one of them.
Losing a spouse is devastating – plain and simple.
The lack of control and utter helplessness,
The finality of death,
The feelings of hopelessness,
The minutes that feel like days.
Lord, I come to you asking for relief – asking for relief from the sadness.
I'm asking for your renewal of my mind and heart. I'm asking for a fresh newness in my life.
I'm asking that I could again feel true happiness that comes without aching from what has been taken from me.
Lord, everything is stale. I am asking for a desire to want what is still in my life.
I'm asking for you to diminish those aching feelings that are never satisfied. Asking you to diminish those thoughts that have no future. Asking for powerful medicine for my mind, my emotions, my heart. Asking that my will could find union with yours in accepting my loss.
Lord, the Bible says you are my portion. Make my portion satisfy me.
Copyright © 2012 written for Inspirational-Prayers.com
Scripture references from the prayer:
"I cried out to you, O Lord: I said, 'You are my refuge, my portion
in the land of the living."
Psalm 142: 5
"The Lord is my portion," says my soul, "Therefore I hope in Him!"
Adam had more of you than anyone has had. Yet you said it is not good for him to be alone.
You made me to want to seek a spouse and fall in love. You molded us to need each other. And now Lord, death has come and dragged my beloved husband out of my arms.
Lord, if I could just board a plane or a boat or a train - if I could just touch the one I love. If I could just see that face again.
But it is your will that I stay here without him.
Lord, in this season, in this place, in my circumstances, bring contentment to me and make your portion enough.
Copyright © 2012 written for Inspirational-Prayers.com
People stand by my side or sit next to me and talk of God or the weather or whatever - and it feels like they are far away. I have to strain if I want to hear them.
I quickly find out that everyone handles grief differently. Some widows tell me how desperate they were for company. While others tell me how desperate they were to be away from people. Both kinds of grieving spouses push me to be like them.
For a long time, I needed to be around people. But I desperately wanted them to talk to each other and not make me try to follow what they were saying.
Some people respected the way I moved through grief, and some tried to ram their grief philosophy down my throat. Some tried to use my late husband against me by telling me what he would want me to do. I even had someone in my church try to bully me to get me back to normal quickly.
God frequently reminded me of what Jesus said, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do."
All I wanted to talk about was my husband. Every thought I had included him. Most of the time remembering him was comforting. But sometimes I felt like I couldn't stand thinking of him any more without being with him.
Life couldn't be this awful.
Death couldn't be this final.
At first I could only think
but I soon realized that the
most urgent questions started with
How can I find the path out of my sea of grief?
How can I live a normal life again?
How in the world can I move forward after this loss?
How can I get out of this grieving time
in the fastest and healthiest way?
And from having been a Christian for a long time, I knew that one of my most important questions should be:
How can I ensure that I stay close to God, as I move through
this all-encompassing grief?
The things I feared most:
The fear that my mind couldn’t stand life without my husband and secondly, that my grief would draw me away from the Lord.
I encourage you to take time to reflect on: What are your biggest fears?
During the first few weeks, I sought comfort from people. I wanted them to speak words that let me know that they understood what I was feeling. I wanted to find someone who felt or had felt like I did.
Several widows came to me to try to comfort me, but they were very different from me and their approaches to grief did not resemble mine. I felt utterly alone. My close relationship with God was more distant than it had ever been. After all, God allowed the other part of me to die.
I found some of the comfort I was looking for in a book. The book was A Grief Observed by C. S. Lewis. He is the only one I have found who could put into words some of the agony in my heart. I read his book in almost one sitting. That book had many pages that seemed to read my mind.
(The book comes in many different versions. The one I read had an afterword by Chad Walsh.)
God sent old friends and new friends to come and help me.
He will send help for you too.
In Conclusion - I say to Grieving Spouses:
The death of a husband or wife begins a terrifying journey into a dark valley.
There is nothing like losing a spouse, but I tell you that you will come through the valley. The world may never look the same but things will get back to a new normal.
The main thing is to keep God the main thing.
New prayer and commentary from the same woman:
I have continued to heal since I wrote the above words.
I have continued to be determined to stay close to God.
God has helped me and been my faithful friend.
I still have periodic times of grief. I still miss my husband.
Sometimes the grief will feel overwhelming for a short time.
The following prayer:
I'm longing for my husband, and this is my prayer to my Lord today.
I gave my heart to my husband.
I don't know how to get it back.
Actually, I don't even want to get it back.
I still want my husband back.
Copyright © 2014 written for Inspirational-Prayers.com
NOTE: This website has a second prayer for grieving page.
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